A Better Man

"Do it"

These are the words that greeted me on my voicemail from Jerry Tuttle this past weekend.

"Do it"

I have to say I have listened to the message 30-40 times. I can't stop. It is a connection to an irretrievable past. It is a link to someone worthwhile and great and straightforward and honest. And gone.

This past weekend, Jerry, a friend of ours, passed away.  No, passed away is too weak. He was taken. Secreted away by a force I cannot negotiate with, cannot understand, cannot fight. He is gone.

But he left me: "Do it."

Now, to say Jerry was loved trivializes the impact he had on others, including good friends of mine.  To say he was respected fails to encompass his achievements.  I had the opportunity to spend time with his friends and associates from JMP on Monday, and what I heard was not the words of a staff missing a boss, but of a movement mourning a leader.  "He was a rocket".  "He saved my life".  "He changed me".  I heard spoken ten times over about Jerry what any of us mortals would love to hear spoken once about ourselves.

And I hear, "Do it." And I listen.

The funny part about the voicemail is that Jerry starts by giving a lot of rationales for why I am making a bad decision.  And they make a lot of sense.  But then he just stops.  And he just says "Do it."  It is straightforward and overwhelmingly persuasive because he is straightforward and without pretense.

Jerry was a mensch.  He was the real deal.

In the business world, great success is rare enough to be noteworthy.  Helping to create JMP is a feat in itself, and it is clear that Jerry was a force to be reckoned with.  But grace is a thing far more rare among the business elite than drive.  And Jerry had grace.

Jerry had the grace to take care of people.  People that I love.  He clearly loved his job, and he clearly loved his people.  In my experience, there are very few leaders who have Jerry's charisma, and there are virtually none who have his grace.

Jerry was also, frankly, fun. 

Almost a year ago, Jerry and I celebrated our birthdays.  He was born one day after me, and our wives, Kara and Stephanie, arranged a phenomenal birthday party in Napa.  It was one of those times when you just get to step back from life for a day and enjoy your family and friends and relish the simple fact that your friends and family are excellent.

Several of our guests brought gifts (frankly, Kara was far more deserving of recognition than I!).  Jerry got two bottles of excellent wine, some top-shelf tequila, and a single malt scotch.  I got four books. 

What I love about it was that we were both mildly irritated about what our friends were telling us...

To Stephanie, you know we think the world of Jerry and of your whole family and that he will live in our hearts.

To Jerry's Mom and Dad, know that in his fewer than 39 years, Jerry gave the world more than most of us could do in 100.  He was a leader, he cared, and he enjoyed life and the people in it.

His loss is profound, maddening, infuriating. But his message was clear.

"Do it."

If you have a thought you want to add, please click "comment" below and tell your story.

Another friend talks about Jerry here.

Comments

[Carter Mack]

Matt,
I was really moved by your thoughts on Jerry. I couldn't agree more. Thanks for making me smile.

Carter

[Joe Jolson]

Matt,
Ditto what Carter said. I was always too scared to fly that close to the sun but lived vicariously throuh all his tales. When Jerry was taken from us so unexpectedly, the "force" felt it. Things will never be as good as would have been without him.case closed.
Take care. See you guys on Monday.
Joe

[Rob Glen]

Matt - Very grateful to you for your lucid and heartfelt prose and to fellow Jerry fan Scott Parsons for pointing me to it, as I've done for others many times since. regards, Rob

[Josh Glantz]

Matt,

Your words, especially when added to the amazing remembrances at Jerry's funeral, can only leave one thinking that we have a long way to go before we can begin to have an impact like Jerry did. Now I know what I have to do. If you don't mind, I am going to borrow the same advice that Jerry left for you. Please give my best to your brothers.

Josh

[John Hendrix]

Matt:

Many, many thanks for your remembrance of Jerry. I don't think that you and I have seen each other since college and then, it turns out, we were both friends of Jerry's. It's remarkable how far Jerry extended himself and how broadly he affected the world around him.

I worked with Jerry back in the mid-90's, while we were both at PaineWebber. Unfortunately, I can't say that I was a close friend of his. But I knew him well enough to be overwhelmed by his generosity, awed by his self-confidence, drawn in by his infectious laugh and great story-telling, and, thankfully, dragged on a couple of epic, Tuttle-esque adventures in New York City partying. The rounds kept coming, the hours slipped away and the bill, mysteriously, never seemed to arrive. And when I thought it was time to leave, Jerry informed me that it was only time to move to the next location. Always leading the charge and always on top of things with a can't-miss plan.

It will take us years to understand the impact that Jerry had on us and many more to try to live up to the high standards he set for us. I feel so fortunate and so blessed to have known him. I will miss him greatly.

John Hendrix